Podcast Episode: A Quickie To Clarify Some Sex Facts

Questions That We've Always Wanted To Ask About Sex

Podcast Episode: A Quickie To Clarify Some Sex Facts

Questions That We've Always Wanted To Ask About Sex

 
 

What is female ejaculation? Is there really a G-spot? Are there different kinds of orgasms? In this Quickie from our podcast Clitastic Chronicles, we asked these questions and more to Dr Jess from InSync Medical to get the up-to-date state of science on some popular belefs about sex.

Episode Transcript

Smile Makers , 00:10
Hi everyone, and welcome to Clitastic Chronicles, a pleasure positive podcast created by Smile Makers for people with a clitoris. I'm Cecile and today I'm speaking with Dr. Jess. Dr. Jess runs a sexual health clinic here in Singapore. A general practitioner by training she has developed a keen interest in female and sexual health. Her practice offers management of female health issues and bridges the gap between regular GT and gynaecologists, and sexual health specialists. Today, we're clarifying a few pop cultures ideas on female sexuality. Are there different types of orgasms? What is really female ejaculation? Is that really just been on these and more, Dr. Jess walks us through the current state of scientific knowledge. Let's get started. Hi Dr Jess. Thanks for joining us at Smile Makers. Today we want to talk about what we call pleasure clarifications. Basically, those topics where we read a lot of things in the media or even like in scientific studies, and we can get a bit confused about what's really what. So those are things like the different types of orgasms, what is really, female ejaculation, is there really a G-spot, if we having sex and we are not lubricating, does that mean that we are actually not turned on. So, those are the kind of like questions that we're getting at Smile Makers and for which we would like to have an educated answer. So thanks a lot for joining us and helping us answer those questions. Okay, let's start with the first question about the different types of orgasms. We hear about vaginal orgasm, clitoral orgasm, breast orgasm, orgasm with just the brain without even touching ourselves. Is there really different types of orgasm? Or does it always come back to having a response from the clitoris?

Dr Jess , 02:16
There's definitely different types of orgasms. And it doesn't mean that it has to boil down to having a response from the clitoris. And the clitoris is doesn't always have to be the star of the show or the star on the night or the morning. With different types of orgasms, and as you were just mentioning it, and if you realize a lot of them are body parts. So take for example, you mentioned vaginal orgasm, that's a body part. Clitoral orgasm, clitoris is a body part as well. And you mentioned breast. That's a body part to our brain is a little bit higher level, right? It involves things like emotions, thoughts, and this is about the way you feel. So that's a higher level type stuff. Now, when when we look at it like that, those these body parts, what, what what how I simply see it is that to get an orgasm, if we stimulate this particular body part, it's probably easy to get the if we focused on those body parts, right. And therefore we then conclude that, hey, this I had is a clitoral orgasm. And it makes it suggestive that the clitoris was the only thing that was worked on that entire time to produce that orgasm. But in actuality, during intimacy, there are many, many, many things that are going on. That's kissing that's going on, there's things that are said that are going on, there are touches on the neck. That's how you feel about the person. But for some reason, the clitoris gets the bulk of the attention. And that's because it's probably the easiest way to then stimulate specific nerves and the clitoris is very, very, very concentrated with nereves compared to other body parts, be itthe breast, be it the vagina. That's one organ that has got so much of nerves concentrated there. So touching it in a very particular way, whichever way is suitable for you and everyone's different, will then generate an orgasm quite quickly, if you desire it. So the clitoris seems to get the attention for for most of the orgasms. But it doesn't always have to translate that way. Take for example, you mentioned brain orgasms. So you could have, you could have a full on fantasy being replayed in your head. You know, and you could be fully 100% in that moment, reliving that fantasy in your mind and you realize, hey, with that fantasy, obviously, that your brain is going to translate that and send signals to various different parts of your body. And you will have a physical manifestation of these thoughts generated from your brain at higher levels centers in your brain. And you might find that you know, hey, you sweat a little bit more. your nipples get a little bit more erected. You see you see more dots around your areola, then you get this pulsation around your vulva, the sense of fullness there, your clitoris might feel a little bit harder. But that does not mean you got clitoral orgasm, because you never touched it. Not once. So we often relate it back to "Hey, this is a full on brain orgasm". Yeah, stimulated directly by thought alone without touching any body part. And you get you get a peek sense of pleasure, that then gives you this orgasmic feeling where you felt for that brief moment, you just had no realization of what's going on around you were lifted off from reality, and you had this super good experience. And that then brings you a brain orgasm. When we're talking about the specifics in terms of body parts, it just means that they featured more in that intimate moment, be it with yourself or be with a partner, it was the highlight of of the intimacy that then generated that particular orgasm. Okay, touching that body part.

Smile Makers , 06:02
Okay. And the next question that I want to ask you today is about the topic of female ejaculation because it's been featured a lot in media, and I guess pornography and it has become kind of a myth, then, people don't always understand what it is exactly, and Eve there's a difference between squirting, female ejaculation and if there's like a physiological reality to it, or if it's really like a social construct.

Dr Jess , 06:35
Well, there's definitely a physiological basis to it. Again, it boils down to our need to see evidence and if somebody can perform an act like squirt. Hey, it's quite phenomenal, isn't it like in a while something can can can in a positive manner, in a projectile manner, be the squirted or ejaculated out of a certain orifice around our vulva. And when when someone can do something that is not not deemed hey very usual, we don't usually see it, it's given a special pedestal. You've got to say, wow, that's a phenomenon, I want to try and see whether I can do that. But then that makes it a targeted thing. And then we have to target and aim for that, for that goal. "So only when I do that, then I know I've truly had an orgasm, or that my partner will know I really had a good time." However, any amounts of release of fluid, be it squirting, female ejaculation or something else may not necessarily always be a good thing. We know. And we are well aware of women who are actually terrified by this process, because they feel that they wet the bed. And they get embarrassed by it. And it becomes cumbersome because they have to change sheets, or they have to do a lot of cleanup after after sex. So this this sort of phenomenon may not be pleasurable for them. And some women do have incontinence of urine. So there's an actual issue going on with the urinary tract and the pelvic floor muscles that makes it difficult for them to, to snapshot the bladder, and the sphincters there that holds the urine urine in when they're having sexual stimulation, and they feel very, very strong pulsations, that the sphincter doesn't work and it allows leakages of urine. Now that's urine incontinence during sex. That is not a pleasant phenomenon for women. However, you spoke about female ejaculation and squirting I often don't understand why. We have patients who are very concerned about finding out "Hey, what's the difference? What did I do? Did I ejaculate? Did I squirt or did I leak urine?" The main thing that they're trying to find out is "am I actually having leakages?" Urinary leakages because I don't want to be peeing during sex. That is embarrassing. For me that is cumbersome. Could I have an actual problem going on with my urine tract that I need to address? Whereas other women are looking to see have they achieved this high pedestal female ejaculation. Now, female ejaculation actually comes from glands. We all have glands around our vulva. And these are like your Bartholin lenses, that sit a bit lower. Then you've got your Skene glands, which are right beside, they are like little fingers of our urine hole, like little guard soldiers around our urine hole, and they get activated, isn't it, when you're getting aroused, and your body's responding with increased blood supply to your vulva and increased action from the glands and they start secreting juices. Sometimes they secrete a lot of juices that that they squirt them out in a projectile manner. Because there's a lot of pressure that's built up within them. But that doesn't mean that that's something that can be achieved by everyone, because it depends on a couple of factors. What your glands are like. You know, have they aged? Have they not aged? what's the what's the health of the vulva? Is there a lot of blood supplying that area of your vulva? Do you have a condition of the vulva? Or are you fully present in that moment or during intercourse that you're willing to fully let go and allow and take on the pulsations that you're receiving at your vulva and you're not afraid of them, you're not worried about what might happen, that "hey I feel like I'm going to pee" feeling. And women are willing to let that go and follow through that, "hey, I got pee feeling I think it's going to, I think I'm going to pee." And then the ejaculation happens. Now, female ejaculation is purely juices secreted by the Skene glands, which are right beside the urine track. Squirting on the other hand, involves a very, very, very tiny amount of super diluted urine. So it mixes up with liquids in the urine track. And it contains a little bit of urine, like leftover urine within the track. And that's what's out. This, I don't really understand why we have this need to you know, establish what's the big difference between the two. But it is a physiological phenomenon. It can happen in women, women who don't have it, can be can be trained in that way to learn to have it. But it's limited by the actual health of the vulva. What's going on around them? Do you have big glands? Do you have small glands? Is there a lot of pressure buildup to allow for that projectile of squirting or this projectile ejaculation?

Smile Makers , 11:33
Okay. Thanks a lot for this clarification. And the next question that I have is also around the area of the vulva and vagina. And that's about the G spot cause we hear about the G-spot in media and we talk about G-spot vibrators, and when it comes to the science, there it becomes a bit more blurry about if it actually exists, what it actually is. So can you help us understand better if there's some such a thing as a G-spot?

Dr Jess , 12:06
Well, we still don't have a very good conclusion whether there is still such a thing as the G spot. What we do understand is that there is such a thing as specific spots in the upper wall of the vagina. And it is different in different women, depending on the distance within the vagina and how deep it is in. Where it's stimulated there and at a certain type of speed with a certain type of pressure, it creates a heightened sensation in women. And that's because these are areas with erectile tissue, they engorge with blood and they become very sensitive or very sensitized. So when touched, they produce a lot of signals up to the spine and up to the brain to be perceived as pleasure. Now, G-spot in itself. They've done many sort of work on cadavers. bodies that have been analyzed post posthumously after these women have died, of course, and they have done dissections, you know, to see where is this exact spot. There is, there is one researcher who found these erectile tissue in these areas, and he was convinced that he found the G spot in women. However, this needs to be replicated consistently within more and more and more cadavers in order for them to establish that: "hey, this is an actual structure there. And it is consistent in all women. Right now the evidence we have is that he no it's not consistent in all women", and where these erectile tissue might be differs between women. However, if you simply have an area and with intimacy, it's about what works for you. It doesn't matter what works for somebody else, but what works for you. So the only way you're going to know whether he whether you have a G spot orgasm or whether you have good sensations from G spot stimulation, or forget the G, you know, any other alphabet you know, you can you literally mean it wherever you want G is named after the person who discovered it, Gräfenberg. So if there are other spots higher up within your your top vaginal wall or to the side and you realize that when you press it like a certain way, you put a little bit more speed around the movement in that area, and that gives you a sensation, then call it your own spot, that's your spot. So that's your spot where you know, you've got you've got a good sensation from it. We don't have to chase the G spot, but that's just like a general guide. You know, hey, if you want to discover yourself, we know there's a special area around here that could work for you.

Smile Makers , 14:35
Okay, awesome. I really like that we could have our own spots and naming the way we want.

Dr Jess , 14:43
Exactly like I could have a J-spot button call it the J-spot, and you can have a C-spot, that's the spot that works for you.

Smile Makers , 14:51
Yeah, I love it. I love it. That's a great idea. Um, the last question that I wanted to ask you for those pleasure clarifications is the connection between, like being turned on, like being really like excited about the sexual encounter that we're having, and lubricating? Hmm. Like, yeah. Do we always lubricate if we are turned on? Or if we're not lubricating, does that mean that we are actually not done on?

Dr Jess , 15:24
God, I wish that was the case that we would lubricate the exact way we want to every time we are turned on. No, it just doesn't translate like that. And, you know, sometimes we can be very aroused, we can really be feeling absolutely in the moment. But for some reason, our glands decide to take a break, you know, "I'm on a holiday, I'm not going to work for you". You can be as turned on as you want. But the glands decide, "look, dude, I'm on a holiday, I'm not going to work today". And that could rely on many factors, right? Like, it could rely on medications that you're taking, it could rely on how hydrated you are on that day, what amount of stress you were feeling earlier on in the day. And this can affect the response of the glands. And so arousal doesn't necessarily translate to the release of a lot of juices from our glands to make us very lubricated. And this is the misconception that we have, a man often get very excited when their partners are wet, they go "oh she's wet now. So you know, she's definitely turned on, or she's definitely you know, at the peak of her arousal". So that's, that's a very huge misconception. And sometimes our body just doesn't work the way we want it to work. And other times it works in a way, which is the exact reverse. So there are there are a lot of women who particularly post delivery, they find that they get too wet, they lubricate extensively, okay, and they find that the sex becomes very slippery, and there's no friction, no grip on the penis, and they're not satisfied with this. So we see the other end of the spectrum as well, where the lubrication comes in too quickly, too fast. And there's already a little bit of laxity, because of vaginal delivery in your vagina never ever returns perfectly back to its pre pregnancies date. So it's already got a bit of laxity there. And it's it's easier for the glands to lubricate in those instances. So they might over lubricate or they might lubricate to the level that you're unsatisfied with. And also because there's already laxity, so you're very reliant on a little bit of that dryness, like on the edge of dry, to create the grip. So when you lubricate through, you find that you don't lose that grip, okay? And the penetrations are not perceived the way you want them to be perceived.

Smile Makers , 17:40
Is it possible that you're lubricating even though you are not turned on?

Dr Jess , 17:46
Surely, you surely are lubricating, even when you're not turned on because that's the natural, that's the natural function of these glands. They're not they're not lubricating only to prepare for sex. Okay, not lubricating only to prepare for an entry of something. There are moments where you know, and every woman would have experienced this, you just jolliby be walking along your way. And then you find that Oh, I feel a little bit better. I feel something seeping through my underwear. Yeah, like a little blob of liquid. You're not turned on. Right? Yeah, but you feel natural secretions happening because lubrications they're different types. You've got lubricants, this constant discharge of liquid from your uterus, through your cervix out into your vagina. And your vagina is not a vault that holds everything in, there is an opening. So over time, there will be some secretions that are that's what we see is sometimes natural discharge, or now on our underwears. At other times, you get the lubrications from your Bartholin glands or sit a little bit lower in your vulva. Then you get the lubrication from the skin glands, which surround your urine hole, which is your urethra. So these fans are in constant motion. They're constantly working to keep the area lubricated, because if they don't work and they cease working, when you're not aroused, you are going to have one hell of a dry vulva over.

Smile Makers , 19:05
Okay. Thank you very much started just to answer all our questions. It's been very enlightening. And we hope to see you soon again For more on this.

Dr Jess , 19:17
No worries to see you always very happy to chat with you. Thank you.

Smile Makers , 19:27
We hope you enjoyed this episode of Clitastic Chronicles and found snippets of wisdom that you can apply to your own sexual health. If you liked this podcast, share it around with your friends and give us a five star review on Apple podcasts or wherever you're getting your podcast from. This will help us make it easy to find. For more sex positivity. head to our website at SmileMakersCollection.com.

What is female ejaculation? Is there really a G-spot? Are there different kinds of orgasms? In this Quickie from our podcast Clitastic Chronicles, we asked these questions and more to Dr Jess from InSync Medical to get the up-to-date state of science on some popular belefs about sex.

Episode Transcript

Smile Makers , 00:10
Hi everyone, and welcome to Clitastic Chronicles, a pleasure positive podcast created by Smile Makers for people with a clitoris. I'm Cecile and today I'm speaking with Dr. Jess. Dr. Jess runs a sexual health clinic here in Singapore. A general practitioner by training she has developed a keen interest in female and sexual health. Her practice offers management of female health issues and bridges the gap between regular GT and gynaecologists, and sexual health specialists. Today, we're clarifying a few pop cultures ideas on female sexuality. Are there different types of orgasms? What is really female ejaculation? Is that really just been on these and more, Dr. Jess walks us through the current state of scientific knowledge. Let's get started. Hi Dr Jess. Thanks for joining us at Smile Makers. Today we want to talk about what we call pleasure clarifications. Basically, those topics where we read a lot of things in the media or even like in scientific studies, and we can get a bit confused about what's really what. So those are things like the different types of orgasms, what is really, female ejaculation, is there really a G-spot, if we having sex and we are not lubricating, does that mean that we are actually not turned on. So, those are the kind of like questions that we're getting at Smile Makers and for which we would like to have an educated answer. So thanks a lot for joining us and helping us answer those questions. Okay, let's start with the first question about the different types of orgasms. We hear about vaginal orgasm, clitoral orgasm, breast orgasm, orgasm with just the brain without even touching ourselves. Is there really different types of orgasm? Or does it always come back to having a response from the clitoris?

Dr Jess , 02:16
There's definitely different types of orgasms. And it doesn't mean that it has to boil down to having a response from the clitoris. And the clitoris is doesn't always have to be the star of the show or the star on the night or the morning. With different types of orgasms, and as you were just mentioning it, and if you realize a lot of them are body parts. So take for example, you mentioned vaginal orgasm, that's a body part. Clitoral orgasm, clitoris is a body part as well. And you mentioned breast. That's a body part to our brain is a little bit higher level, right? It involves things like emotions, thoughts, and this is about the way you feel. So that's a higher level type stuff. Now, when when we look at it like that, those these body parts, what, what what how I simply see it is that to get an orgasm, if we stimulate this particular body part, it's probably easy to get the if we focused on those body parts, right. And therefore we then conclude that, hey, this I had is a clitoral orgasm. And it makes it suggestive that the clitoris was the only thing that was worked on that entire time to produce that orgasm. But in actuality, during intimacy, there are many, many, many things that are going on. That's kissing that's going on, there's things that are said that are going on, there are touches on the neck. That's how you feel about the person. But for some reason, the clitoris gets the bulk of the attention. And that's because it's probably the easiest way to then stimulate specific nerves and the clitoris is very, very, very concentrated with nereves compared to other body parts, be itthe breast, be it the vagina. That's one organ that has got so much of nerves concentrated there. So touching it in a very particular way, whichever way is suitable for you and everyone's different, will then generate an orgasm quite quickly, if you desire it. So the clitoris seems to get the attention for for most of the orgasms. But it doesn't always have to translate that way. Take for example, you mentioned brain orgasms. So you could have, you could have a full on fantasy being replayed in your head. You know, and you could be fully 100% in that moment, reliving that fantasy in your mind and you realize, hey, with that fantasy, obviously, that your brain is going to translate that and send signals to various different parts of your body. And you will have a physical manifestation of these thoughts generated from your brain at higher levels centers in your brain. And you might find that you know, hey, you sweat a little bit more. your nipples get a little bit more erected. You see you see more dots around your areola, then you get this pulsation around your vulva, the sense of fullness there, your clitoris might feel a little bit harder. But that does not mean you got clitoral orgasm, because you never touched it. Not once. So we often relate it back to "Hey, this is a full on brain orgasm". Yeah, stimulated directly by thought alone without touching any body part. And you get you get a peek sense of pleasure, that then gives you this orgasmic feeling where you felt for that brief moment, you just had no realization of what's going on around you were lifted off from reality, and you had this super good experience. And that then brings you a brain orgasm. When we're talking about the specifics in terms of body parts, it just means that they featured more in that intimate moment, be it with yourself or be with a partner, it was the highlight of of the intimacy that then generated that particular orgasm. Okay, touching that body part.

Smile Makers , 06:02
Okay. And the next question that I want to ask you today is about the topic of female ejaculation because it's been featured a lot in media, and I guess pornography and it has become kind of a myth, then, people don't always understand what it is exactly, and Eve there's a difference between squirting, female ejaculation and if there's like a physiological reality to it, or if it's really like a social construct.

Dr Jess , 06:35
Well, there's definitely a physiological basis to it. Again, it boils down to our need to see evidence and if somebody can perform an act like squirt. Hey, it's quite phenomenal, isn't it like in a while something can can can in a positive manner, in a projectile manner, be the squirted or ejaculated out of a certain orifice around our vulva. And when when someone can do something that is not not deemed hey very usual, we don't usually see it, it's given a special pedestal. You've got to say, wow, that's a phenomenon, I want to try and see whether I can do that. But then that makes it a targeted thing. And then we have to target and aim for that, for that goal. "So only when I do that, then I know I've truly had an orgasm, or that my partner will know I really had a good time." However, any amounts of release of fluid, be it squirting, female ejaculation or something else may not necessarily always be a good thing. We know. And we are well aware of women who are actually terrified by this process, because they feel that they wet the bed. And they get embarrassed by it. And it becomes cumbersome because they have to change sheets, or they have to do a lot of cleanup after after sex. So this this sort of phenomenon may not be pleasurable for them. And some women do have incontinence of urine. So there's an actual issue going on with the urinary tract and the pelvic floor muscles that makes it difficult for them to, to snapshot the bladder, and the sphincters there that holds the urine urine in when they're having sexual stimulation, and they feel very, very strong pulsations, that the sphincter doesn't work and it allows leakages of urine. Now that's urine incontinence during sex. That is not a pleasant phenomenon for women. However, you spoke about female ejaculation and squirting I often don't understand why. We have patients who are very concerned about finding out "Hey, what's the difference? What did I do? Did I ejaculate? Did I squirt or did I leak urine?" The main thing that they're trying to find out is "am I actually having leakages?" Urinary leakages because I don't want to be peeing during sex. That is embarrassing. For me that is cumbersome. Could I have an actual problem going on with my urine tract that I need to address? Whereas other women are looking to see have they achieved this high pedestal female ejaculation. Now, female ejaculation actually comes from glands. We all have glands around our vulva. And these are like your Bartholin lenses, that sit a bit lower. Then you've got your Skene glands, which are right beside, they are like little fingers of our urine hole, like little guard soldiers around our urine hole, and they get activated, isn't it, when you're getting aroused, and your body's responding with increased blood supply to your vulva and increased action from the glands and they start secreting juices. Sometimes they secrete a lot of juices that that they squirt them out in a projectile manner. Because there's a lot of pressure that's built up within them. But that doesn't mean that that's something that can be achieved by everyone, because it depends on a couple of factors. What your glands are like. You know, have they aged? Have they not aged? what's the what's the health of the vulva? Is there a lot of blood supplying that area of your vulva? Do you have a condition of the vulva? Or are you fully present in that moment or during intercourse that you're willing to fully let go and allow and take on the pulsations that you're receiving at your vulva and you're not afraid of them, you're not worried about what might happen, that "hey I feel like I'm going to pee" feeling. And women are willing to let that go and follow through that, "hey, I got pee feeling I think it's going to, I think I'm going to pee." And then the ejaculation happens. Now, female ejaculation is purely juices secreted by the Skene glands, which are right beside the urine track. Squirting on the other hand, involves a very, very, very tiny amount of super diluted urine. So it mixes up with liquids in the urine track. And it contains a little bit of urine, like leftover urine within the track. And that's what's out. This, I don't really understand why we have this need to you know, establish what's the big difference between the two. But it is a physiological phenomenon. It can happen in women, women who don't have it, can be can be trained in that way to learn to have it. But it's limited by the actual health of the vulva. What's going on around them? Do you have big glands? Do you have small glands? Is there a lot of pressure buildup to allow for that projectile of squirting or this projectile ejaculation?

Smile Makers , 11:33
Okay. Thanks a lot for this clarification. And the next question that I have is also around the area of the vulva and vagina. And that's about the G spot cause we hear about the G-spot in media and we talk about G-spot vibrators, and when it comes to the science, there it becomes a bit more blurry about if it actually exists, what it actually is. So can you help us understand better if there's some such a thing as a G-spot?

Dr Jess , 12:06
Well, we still don't have a very good conclusion whether there is still such a thing as the G spot. What we do understand is that there is such a thing as specific spots in the upper wall of the vagina. And it is different in different women, depending on the distance within the vagina and how deep it is in. Where it's stimulated there and at a certain type of speed with a certain type of pressure, it creates a heightened sensation in women. And that's because these are areas with erectile tissue, they engorge with blood and they become very sensitive or very sensitized. So when touched, they produce a lot of signals up to the spine and up to the brain to be perceived as pleasure. Now, G-spot in itself. They've done many sort of work on cadavers. bodies that have been analyzed post posthumously after these women have died, of course, and they have done dissections, you know, to see where is this exact spot. There is, there is one researcher who found these erectile tissue in these areas, and he was convinced that he found the G spot in women. However, this needs to be replicated consistently within more and more and more cadavers in order for them to establish that: "hey, this is an actual structure there. And it is consistent in all women. Right now the evidence we have is that he no it's not consistent in all women", and where these erectile tissue might be differs between women. However, if you simply have an area and with intimacy, it's about what works for you. It doesn't matter what works for somebody else, but what works for you. So the only way you're going to know whether he whether you have a G spot orgasm or whether you have good sensations from G spot stimulation, or forget the G, you know, any other alphabet you know, you can you literally mean it wherever you want G is named after the person who discovered it, Gräfenberg. So if there are other spots higher up within your your top vaginal wall or to the side and you realize that when you press it like a certain way, you put a little bit more speed around the movement in that area, and that gives you a sensation, then call it your own spot, that's your spot. So that's your spot where you know, you've got you've got a good sensation from it. We don't have to chase the G spot, but that's just like a general guide. You know, hey, if you want to discover yourself, we know there's a special area around here that could work for you.

Smile Makers , 14:35
Okay, awesome. I really like that we could have our own spots and naming the way we want.

Dr Jess , 14:43
Exactly like I could have a J-spot button call it the J-spot, and you can have a C-spot, that's the spot that works for you.

Smile Makers , 14:51
Yeah, I love it. I love it. That's a great idea. Um, the last question that I wanted to ask you for those pleasure clarifications is the connection between, like being turned on, like being really like excited about the sexual encounter that we're having, and lubricating? Hmm. Like, yeah. Do we always lubricate if we are turned on? Or if we're not lubricating, does that mean that we are actually not done on?

Dr Jess , 15:24
God, I wish that was the case that we would lubricate the exact way we want to every time we are turned on. No, it just doesn't translate like that. And, you know, sometimes we can be very aroused, we can really be feeling absolutely in the moment. But for some reason, our glands decide to take a break, you know, "I'm on a holiday, I'm not going to work for you". You can be as turned on as you want. But the glands decide, "look, dude, I'm on a holiday, I'm not going to work today". And that could rely on many factors, right? Like, it could rely on medications that you're taking, it could rely on how hydrated you are on that day, what amount of stress you were feeling earlier on in the day. And this can affect the response of the glands. And so arousal doesn't necessarily translate to the release of a lot of juices from our glands to make us very lubricated. And this is the misconception that we have, a man often get very excited when their partners are wet, they go "oh she's wet now. So you know, she's definitely turned on, or she's definitely you know, at the peak of her arousal". So that's, that's a very huge misconception. And sometimes our body just doesn't work the way we want it to work. And other times it works in a way, which is the exact reverse. So there are there are a lot of women who particularly post delivery, they find that they get too wet, they lubricate extensively, okay, and they find that the sex becomes very slippery, and there's no friction, no grip on the penis, and they're not satisfied with this. So we see the other end of the spectrum as well, where the lubrication comes in too quickly, too fast. And there's already a little bit of laxity, because of vaginal delivery in your vagina never ever returns perfectly back to its pre pregnancies date. So it's already got a bit of laxity there. And it's it's easier for the glands to lubricate in those instances. So they might over lubricate or they might lubricate to the level that you're unsatisfied with. And also because there's already laxity, so you're very reliant on a little bit of that dryness, like on the edge of dry, to create the grip. So when you lubricate through, you find that you don't lose that grip, okay? And the penetrations are not perceived the way you want them to be perceived.

Smile Makers , 17:40
Is it possible that you're lubricating even though you are not turned on?

Dr Jess , 17:46
Surely, you surely are lubricating, even when you're not turned on because that's the natural, that's the natural function of these glands. They're not they're not lubricating only to prepare for sex. Okay, not lubricating only to prepare for an entry of something. There are moments where you know, and every woman would have experienced this, you just jolliby be walking along your way. And then you find that Oh, I feel a little bit better. I feel something seeping through my underwear. Yeah, like a little blob of liquid. You're not turned on. Right? Yeah, but you feel natural secretions happening because lubrications they're different types. You've got lubricants, this constant discharge of liquid from your uterus, through your cervix out into your vagina. And your vagina is not a vault that holds everything in, there is an opening. So over time, there will be some secretions that are that's what we see is sometimes natural discharge, or now on our underwears. At other times, you get the lubrications from your Bartholin glands or sit a little bit lower in your vulva. Then you get the lubrication from the skin glands, which surround your urine hole, which is your urethra. So these fans are in constant motion. They're constantly working to keep the area lubricated, because if they don't work and they cease working, when you're not aroused, you are going to have one hell of a dry vulva over.

Smile Makers , 19:05
Okay. Thank you very much started just to answer all our questions. It's been very enlightening. And we hope to see you soon again For more on this.

Dr Jess , 19:17
No worries to see you always very happy to chat with you. Thank you.

Smile Makers , 19:27
We hope you enjoyed this episode of Clitastic Chronicles and found snippets of wisdom that you can apply to your own sexual health. If you liked this podcast, share it around with your friends and give us a five star review on Apple podcasts or wherever you're getting your podcast from. This will help us make it easy to find. For more sex positivity. head to our website at SmileMakersCollection.com.

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