When it comes to the female orgasm, there is not just one experience that all women share. In fact, women describe their orgasms in very different ways, and they even disagree about how an orgasm feels.
This leads to a lot of confusion about what the female orgasm is. Are these women all orgasming if they’re feeling different things?
There’s nothing to fear about the uniqueness of the female orgasm. In fact, that uniqueness adds something special.
Male and female orgasms.
Physically, there are four different ways that orgasms differ between the sexes
- Women can have repeated orgasms at very short intervals; men cannot.
- Orgasms can last longer in a woman.
- The pelvic muscles contract differently during orgasm.
- Male orgasm cannot be stopped once it starts; female orgasm may halt if stimulation disappears.
Another interesting difference is that women continue to feel stimulation after they orgasm. There is preliminary evidence that men may not feel stimulation immediately after orgasm.
It’s become clear that women and men do not respond in the same ways to stimulation. In fact, each sex needs a different type of stimulation pre-orgasm.
Women respond to sexual stimulation better if they are in an active state, such as after riding a roller coaster or laughing a lot. This activated sense gets most women in the mood better than any long bubble bath or romantic movie!
Women also face a unique, mental struggle when it comes to orgasms that men do not face. For women, it can be difficult to know if they had an orgasm or not, and this causes a lot of confusion. This confusion can lead to trouble engaging in sexual activity and related, complex issues.
Female orgasms and bodies are all different.
Female orgasms should be considered a subjective experience for each, individual woman. There are no standards that can be used to identify what qualifies as an orgasm outside of the laboratory, so women can only rely on their experiences to classify what is and what is not an orgasm.
Different women orgasm better from different types of stimulation. Part of the reason for this is the difference in the location of the clitoris and the vagina’s structure. Every body is unique, and the clitoris and vagina are also unique. The smaller the clitoris is, the harder it is to have an orgasm.
There are even women who have too many nerve endings in their vagina, which leads to intense sexual pain in the genital area whenever they are stimulated.
Orgasms can also differ based on the emotional state of your body, including mental and relationship states. After all, our brain is in control of how we process all sensory feelings in our body, include sexual stimulation!
Orgasms are more than just a physical experience. Our senses, our emotions, our brains, and our decisions all play a part in the way that an orgasm builds, feels, and occurs. We all have different bodies, and the female orgasm is affected by those differences.
Female orgasm varies a lot…
It’s easy to get caught up in the stress of whether or not you orgasm – don’t!
The difference in paths or orgasm and other types of sexual pleasure can lead to a variety of exciting sexual experiences that give you the chance to explore and discover your body.
Get curious about your sexual experience.
While it might seem like your attempts to learn about your body and reach orgasm are useless, you shouldn’t give up.
Your sexual experience, just like anything else, can be trained. With exploration, you not only learn what your body responds to best, but you learn how your unique response to stimulation feels.
As you hone this experience and your body becomes more accustomed to sexual stimulation, you’ll find that it’s easier to reach orgasm, and orgasm may occur more rapidly.
Learning about your body and indulging in that knowledge may help you find sexual satisfaction.
Relax, enjoy yourself. Literally.
Everyone has a different set of sexual experiences, but everyone puts the same type of pressure on themselves to achieve an orgasm.
The fact of the matter is that there is no one standard experience.
Throughout our lives, we will have different experiences of sex, and our sexuality will constantly be changing and evolving to fit our mind, body, and desires.
It’s time that we drop our barriers and release that pressure. Let’s worry less about orgasming and more about the ability to enjoy the experience. It’s time to see the diversity of sexual feelings and experiences as a chance to explore our sexual life!
Sources:
- https://kinseyinstitute.org/pdf/womens%20orgasm%20annual%20review.pdf
- http://www.bbc.com/future/story/20150625-the-mystery-of-the-female-orgasm
- http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-38170324
- https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5087699/
- https://kinseyconfidential.org/women-orgasms/
- https://kinseyconfidential.org/resources/sexual-pleasure-orgasm/
- https://kinseyconfidential.org/qa-how-can-i-have-an-orgasm/
